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Thursday, September 29, 2011

Fall

Every year at the end of August, as I anticipate the fall, I wonder if summer might go on forever. It seems impossible that it could end. The world is so green and so alive, and I can remember so many summers. It seems like all of my life has been summer. But here we are at the end of September, and the leaves have started to change. I can smell the familiar approaching chilly days. Without realizing it, I'm leaving the house wearing sweaters.

The beginning of any season brings with it confidence. I have plans, however indistinct, for the coming months. I know what to expect. I know the pattern. Fall is especially invigorating because of the cool and comfortable weather. I no longer have to dress with the aim of achieving maximum airflow to my skin.

This is the first fall I haven't been in school since I was four. Sure, I started classes in August, but I'd dropped them all by early September, and when I left I was still wearing short shorts and sweating on the walk home. The beginning of the season has always been closely tied to the beginning of school for me, and it's nice to drop all of those distractions and look at the season a little more closely. From now on, my life is a circle. School creates a pattern of starting and stopping lines--fall is the beginning of one year, spring is the end, and summer is the space in between. Then a new line starts. Now, I'm just moving through the seasons, never really stopping or starting. It feels nice.